Hey Fredrick Gold! This is an excellent question, thanks for asking!
I see 3 main facets to the answer to that question. Let’s go through them one by one.
- Putting “you” in your writing requires honesty, transparency, and authenticity. I definitely try to hit all 3 buckets when writing. Depending on the subject I’m dealing with, it’s more or less easy and/or necessary. I am a rather private person, but I also know that people relate a lot more to written content when it’s filled with personal examples and experiences. I have no problem opening up in that case. It helps people, and it’s also a great auto-evaluation process. Why do I do some things in my life? How can I improve? Writing about all that definitely helps.
- Putting “you” in your writing also encompasses the people in your life. I do sometimes include examples from my friends and/or family, but that’s less frequent. The reason behind this is that it’s somehow much easier for me to analyse my own behaviour and thought patterns than to try to interpret other people’s behaviour. Not that self-analysis is an easy task, I just thrive more in that somehow! I also sometimes don’t have the full context with other people. Maybe there are factors I am not aware of that led that person to do this and that. So I most of the time stick to my own personal experiences, for now.
- Finally, putting “you” in your writing also means taking time away from your friends, family and social connections. When you write, you work, and when you work, you’re not hanging out with those people. Like a lot of people, I try to practice the act of balancing work and social life, and I like to think I’m okay at it. Notice that I do not say I HAVE balance, but I practice the ACT of balancing. That’s because there’s no such thing as balance, only the act of balancing your life. You can’t be in balance all the time, you have to go back and forth between the different elements of your life, and this synergy creates the act of balancing. It’s totally okay to be out of balance. In fact, it’s required if you want to get anything done. When I work, I’m out of balance with my social life, but I know I will make up for it in allocated slots in my calendar. The trick is to “never go so far in one extreme that you can’t find your way back or stay so long that there is nothing waiting for you when you return”. This quote is from from Gary Keller’s book The ONE Thing, highly recommend. I wrote more about the myth of the balanced life here if you’re interested!
I hope this helps! Thanks so much for reading, and thanks for the support!